There are a few weeks since name-giving obsesses me. First – I had to change the name of my cat. Then, I got to listen to various jokes about new babies’ names. Then, it was work-related stuff about wineries’ names. All those made me think about the unfortunate word-combinations some people make when they establish something.
Let’s take my cat, for example. She is a cranky beauty who spits on everyone, but adores me. Born in a barn, she was named Foxy by her previous male owner. Can you believe the misfortune of having a man naming her, and living her first years with a peasant name? Well, it took a whole afternoon for three of us going through the dictionary and mythology, to find a name suitable to her personality. We gave her a short goddess name, from an exotic foreign language. How many of you dare to call your cats anything less than god-like creatures? They are the very definition of elegance and aristocracy! The only peasant term allowed for ours, now, is “bitch” – when she scratches the couch. But that’s all.
I’ll skip all together the issue of naming your kid all sorts of apple sauces and things he/she will be mocked and traumatized in school. That’s your choice for his and your future mental health.
And let me go to naming a business – in this case some wineries. I was frustrated typing business name that goes like “Albatross with Three Wings Vineyard and Winery”. Then, here it comes the domain website, under this name, and the emails for employees – that may sound like winemaker.spitzenberger@albatrosswiththreewingswines.com. Oops. I just filled more than half line on my Word page. Would you like an email that long? Me neither!
I mean, really? Do you want your customers to remember THAT name? Do you want them to get the email address right from the first three trials? How do you carve your name in their minds? And, oh, foreign words that mean something only to YOU will eventually lead to countless daily questions about the meaning and typing – and trust me, spelling my last name every single damn time is not funny, either.
Just remember, when you establish your business – keep the name short, sweet, easy. People identify with things they understand and reject the unknown. If you can, spend an extra 200 bucks for a marketing whiz who can think for you. You’ll spare everybody’s time and nerves, in the future, and make your money back in no time.
Wine Cub 